Tuesday, September 8, 2009

World Domination in Disguise

Facebook wants to be our only friend, so it can "indirectly" manipulate our lives to its wishes. It does it by seemingly bringing us closer together, with wall postings, sharing quizzes, tagging photos. But, it is all just a cover-up.

All those fancy gadgets are meant to break our relationships. Just like two end of a chopsticks, when we try to bring them closer together, it would eventually break. How does Facebook do this?

...Rather, we're breaking a cardinal rule of companionship: Thou Shalt Not Bore Thy Friends...

It works with this rule: We don't like being friends with boring people. (Whether or not it is true is yet to be determined) Thus, Facebook makes us boring. To be more precise, Facebook causes us to bore people with unnecessary nonsense. Take a look below.

"It's called narcissism," says Matt Brown, a 36-year-old business-development manager for a chain of hair salons and spas in Seattle. He's particularly annoyed by a friend who works at an auto dealership who tweets every time he sells a car, a married couple who bicker on Facebook's public walls and another couple so "mooshy-gooshy" they sit in the same room of their house posting love messages to each other for all to see. "Why is your life so frickin' important and entertaining that we need to know?" Mr. Brown says.

What can we individuals go to go against this powerful enterprise? They have programmers to woo our every desire and bring down our defenses. They can create games even better than Restaurant City, quizzes more interesting than "Which L4D zombie are you?", heck, they could even create a better you.

There is still hope. We are humans, there is nothing we have not been through. We have been eaten by tigers, we have been to the moon, we have been to the lowest place, highest place, coldest place, hottest place on earth. Which other species can claim to have done all those things? There is also no other species on Earth that kill each other for reasons other than survival.

To prevent Facebook from controlling humans, thus the world, we must refrain from every temptation of entering the enticing pages of Facebook. We must not enter Facebook after checking our e-mail. We must not stare at friends' photos. We must not tag ugly photos of friends. We must not try nonsensical quizzes (telling you that you are a witch). We must start wishing friends' happy birthday in person or by phone, not through Facebook. We must not rely on Facebook to remind us of friends' birthday. We can do it!

Let's be frank with ourselves: We can never do all that. Facebook is an addiction, like drugs and cigarettes. Once you are in, you can never come out. Facebook will rule the world. Facebook is King.

Quotes are taken from: How Facebook Can Ruin Your Friendships - WSJ.com


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